I had a dream this morning that made little sense to me. However, since God likes to talk to me in dreams, I have learned to pursue their meaning and not just dismiss them. A few years ago He nudged me to buy a book called “God’s Prophetic Symbolism in everyday life”. It can be found on Amazon. I have found this book to be quite helpful in at least getting me started in figuring out my dreams, but I do believe the interpretation of all dreams ultimately belongs to God Himself. In Genesis 40:8 we are told about Joseph, who being in prison, finds both the baker and the cupbearer, who are also in prison, sad, because they have each had a dream that no one can interpret. So Joseph said to them, “Do not interpretations belong to God?”
Obviously, the enemy likes to give us false dreams as well, but I’m not talking about those in this post. At any rate, I took the symbols in my dream and looked them up in my book. It still made little sense to me, so I went to the Lord and asked Him what He was trying to tell me. Let me make clear here that the God that I am referring to here is the God of the Bible, whose Son Jesus Christ came to earth and died on a cross for our sins and then rose from the dead on the third day. He now sits at the right hand of the Father in heaven. He’s alive and therefore He hears my prayers.
I dreamed that on the ground floor of my house was a train station. There was a train track running through it and there were even little rooms where people waited for the train to come. I saw two small trains, each with just one car and an engine slowly come through on the tracks. I remember talking to two different groups of people, one was a man with his partner and their child. Another, was a woman who offered to pay me a dollar to get on the train. I told her that if she was local, the train ride was free. My little train station was very rough around the edges, with stone walls and floors, and not the slightest bit fancy.
As I sat at the Lord’s feet and asked Him what He was trying to tell me, I heard Him say the same thing to me that He has told me several times in the past. Let me explain. The train represents ministry, and the house represents me. This little blog of mine is my ministry. I reach people all over the world with the words that I write. Unfortunately, as easy as it is for me to write, it is also very hard.
I’ve had several people tell me that my ministry is useless and just entertaining, or even more sadly that I’m boasting when I share what the Lord tells me. I hear that my blog really has no value. I know in my mind that this is not true, but my heart wants to believe it. My greatest desire is not to entertain. I want to share with others what God is teaching me and pray that my words change lives, like His words have changed mine. But I am also lazy. I will admit it. Writing takes effort and time. So I come up with excuses for not writing this week, or even this month.
So what did the Lord show me this morning about my dream? He repeated what He has told me numerous times in the past. I have been called to write. So write already! He has given me this gift to share with others. The funny thing is that at first I thought the dream was just another admonition to write. Some encouragement if you will. But as the morning wore on, and I was coming up with yet another excuse not to write, I realized something that frightened me. The dream was also a warning. Just as with the parable of the talents in Matthew 25:14-30, I was in fact, burying my “one”talent. The symbolism of the woman offering me one dollar in my dream was not lost on me. Perhaps I don’t have the same bad attitude that the wicked, lazy servant had. I certainly don’t believe that the Lord is “a hard man, reaping where (He has) not sown, and gathering where (he has) not scattered seed.” But nonetheless, regardless of my attitude, I was lazy and wasting my talent. Does that make me wicked? I doubt it. I know the Lord loves me and I certainly love Him. But He also makes it very clear in scripture, that if we love Him, we will do what He commands us to do (John 14:15). He has commanded me to write, regardless of how others feels about that or even how I feel about that.
Please understand that I am not trying to base my salvation on whether or not I am writing enough. I do not believe that I am saved by my works. Paul makes that very clear in Ephesians 2:8-9: “For by grace you have been saved through faith, and that not of yourselves; it is the gift of God, not of works, lest anyone should boast.”
Nonetheless, I felt that this morning He was warning me to stop being lazy and use my gift. If you’ve come this far and are still reading this, what gift comes to your mind, that you have buried? What gift are you too lazy or perhaps too afraid to use to bless others with? Not all the gifts make people feel warm and fuzzy. Sometimes we are called to speak truth, when no one wants to hear it. Not all the gifts bring us the praises of men, for then we would already have our reward. Some gifts require courage and stepping out in faith and are met with resistance because they don’t make people feel good. No one wants to have their “mail read”, if you will. I’ve been told that the reason why people don’t share my blog, is because my writing is “edgy” and makes them uncomfortable. It convicts people and therefore they don’t feel good about sharing it. But at the same time I get all kinds of private messages telling me that I’m spot on. So, I will repeat, I cannot use the bad responses or my own laziness as an excuse to stop. How about you?